quiet

This is the second full school week for my family. It has been different with Luke and the kids running out the door each morning. Its loud beautiful chaos (Where is your shoe? Did you grab a mask? Everyone have their homework?) and then… quiet.

(Now don’t get me wrong, I am totally thankful they get to be AT school. I know many of my fellow parents don’t have that luxury right now and are having to add the “home school teacher” or “virtual learning assistant” to their many hats they already wear. I see you guys.)

But, these quiet mornings before I jump in to work have given me a chance to actually think and to spend time with God. I am not sure why quiet moments during quarantine were so hard because we weren’t doing as “much.” In some ways it felt like we were just tackling a day at a time. Now that I have had the first chance in months to stop, it’s been a weird rush of emotions and thoughts. It is kind of overwhelming to be honest.

So many changes have occurred the last 5-6 months. The world is obviously in a very different state and what is the new normal? And like everyone, the effects of the world’s craziness have impacted our family.

Things that were normal for us had to be put on hold (which can I say my kids have been so flexible.. which is incredible given their tendencies to struggle with transitions. They have been rock stars and I am so proud of them). Now we are starting to do some of those things again… but they look so different. We have also had many close friends deciding to move and transition to new things (which is both exciting and hard). Foster care is in a really weird state. There aren’t many children coming in to care (which is most likely because kids aren’t in school or in normal activities where things are reported), which also makes me sad thinking about the possibilities (please pray for these children).

Work for me has been total confusion. My team and I have only shot 3 of the 21 weddings I had scheduled for 2020 for Captured Photography. My other photography/marketing work (www.jennyschartner.com) has significantly died down because my clients are primarily hotels, resorts, and restaurants.. and they are hurting big time too. I have started to reach out for other job opportunities because I just don’t know what the future holds. I told someone yesterday, I feel like I have my hands in like ten different pots right now… just waiting to see which one will actually start cooking something. Not feeling like a failure is hard.

But, even as I write all that, I am telling myself I have so very much to be grateful for. COVID, the economy, etc… they have had a much worse effect on others. I can’t complain.

And this weird time has brought many blessings. We had so much time together as a family. We were able to live at our Lake Shack for most of the quarantine which was a huge plus. In many ways it has grown our family dynamic and our marriage.

I just wanted to get on here and update you (the five people that follow this blog, haha). Also, I wanted to share what I was learning this morning…

Some days we may not be sure which way to go, which track to take, which path to follow. This time has brought on a lot of those questions for a lot of us. You may even find your feet planted in the ground at a fork in the road. How do we get plucked out of this swamp of indecision? How do we sort through all these emotions wrapped up in 2020?

We turn to God and His promises. He already knows where we’re supposed to go. He will show us the way (He doesn’t keep things a secret). We just need to ask.. and be patient as He answers us in HIS timing.

I may not know all the answers right away, but God promises peace in the waiting.

Jeremiah 33:3

Isaiah 30:21