November is #nationaladoptionmonth

Adoption is beautiful. It truly is. It’s such a picture of God’s redemption. Everyday I am overwhelmed with gratitude that God stepped in and changed the path for our boys. Jax and Josiah bring so much joy to our lives. I am very blessed to be their mom. But, the reality is there is no adoption without loss and pain . . . and grief. You have heard me say this before if you have followed our journey.

Years ago we became a foster family to these boys through hard circumstances. We became their forever family because attempts to reunify them with their biological family failed. I grieve the loss of my boy’s birth parents (all four of them). I am sad they are missing moments. I am sad for my boys that something so precious as a bond between a parent and child had to be broken.These are the bittersweet aspects of adoption. It’s beautiful. It’s heartbreaking. It’s a lot. But I’m so thankful we said yes. I am thankful to have an opportunity to love beyond my own means.

Today marks the end of a journey. It’s the day our foster care license expires.

It’s bittersweet for sure. The past 8 years have been an incredible, ridiculously hard, amazing, life changing experience. We were able to see many children come through the doors of our home. They each taught us something. Their stories opened our eyes to see the world differently. Some stayed for days, some never left . We did this thing as a family. Together.

I want to thank God for putting this on our hearts years ago. And for giving us strength each time we desperately needed it. For giving us peace in the many unknowns. And most importantly for loving us so we could love these children and their families.

Thank you as well to you.. our community for loving, encouraging, and supporting us and these children too.

We are still passionate about foster care and will continue to advocate for these kids in other ways. We also are excited to begin mentoring new foster/adoptive families.

if you are ever interested in learning more about fostering or how you can help support other foster families, it’s a subject we’re always ready to talk about! Let us know.

Hi there! There has been so much going on.. and I haven’t had the opportunity to sit and write lately.

But…. May is a great month! One, because summer is around the corner. I LOVE SUMMER! Another reason is because it is Foster Care Awareness Month.

It is a time where a lot of people talk about the realities of what is going on around us in the foster care system. It is a month that for first time, many people find out what’s happening in their own backyards!

There are currently more than 430,000 children living within the American foster care system. In our backyard here in South Florida, there are 2500 children in DCF Care.

If you are local to my area.. you can find the latest numbers here on this interactive map.

https://www.4kids.us/ClosetoHome

There are also hundreds of thousands of those children in foster care that are available to be adopted right now.

I heard a crazy stat… that if just one family out of three churches would adopt one of thse children.. it would eliminate orphans in America. Certainly three churches can come alongside one family and support them?

But.. it’s not happening. The average child waits THREE years to be adopted. Over 25% will wait FIVE years or more (and end up aging out of foster care).

So, each day this month on Facebook I have been sharing ideas of you can get involved.

I thought I would also put that list here.. so it’s easy to share and have all together. I will be adding to it each day this month. Maybe an idea or two will inspire you!

May 1-  First idea, and this is a fun and delicious one. Provide a meal once a month for a family who fosters. I can’t tell you how awesome it is when someone has done this for us. Whether it’s a home cooked meal, a gift card, or even someone picking up our bill when we are out to eat. It’s a little breath of encouragement!

May 2– Buy Birthday or Christmas gifts for children in foster care. Contact local agencies and add them to your list of presents!

May 3- Here is Day 3! And it’s an easy one. Donate your gently used items you don’t need want or need anymore. A lot of us have been into simplifying and cleaning out. So give your items to places that will provide them to foster families!

May 4- Pay for an activity for a foster child. Offer to pay for their music lessons or dance classes. Or maybe for them to play a season of soccer or baseball? These things get really expensive the more kids you have… so as a foster parent when someone takes the financial burden away for something like that… it’s so amazing! Plus, these kids should be able to be involved in extra curricular activities too! And if the other children in the home are doing them, it helps them to feel included.

If you don’t know a foster family personally… but your children are involved in extra curricular activities, maybe approach the director or owner and offer to them you are willing to help out if they know of a foster child. There are more foster families around then you think!

May 5- Offer a service to help out a foster family that will free up their time. For example, mowing/cleaning up their lawn, cleaning a pool, cleaning their home.. whether it’s you personally or you pay for a service for a little while, this is a huge help. Foster parents have extremely long days at times and have seasons where a lot of their time is just thrown into parenting children who have experienced horrible traumas. I know personally, those everyday house things can be hard to even manage in the midst of hard seasons (our pool may or may not be green currently.. and you don’t want to see my bathrooms 😬 lol).

If you own a pool or lawn company.. add that family to your rotation maybe once a month or every other. It does really help!

May 6- Help watch the kiddos! This could look like a few different things…

Watch all the kids and let the parents go out or even get an overnight to themselves. This gives us a much needed break to breathe, talk, and regroup. What we do is so hard emotionally and physically.. we need breaks.

Now, I know from experience that sometimes babysitting without us there just doesn’t work and it’s only more stressful because we are worried how our foster child may respond to someone else… so in those seasons…

Be an extra pair of hands when foster families go somewhere – offer to come along to the zoo, to the playground, to the beach. It gives you an opportunity to get to know the kids more.. and it’s gives the parents some help!
I’m so thankful for the times our parents, siblings, or friends have come along to spend time with us. Especially if we have a child who is in a hard season.. it allows us to take the time we need to with that child to get them back on track without it impacting everyone else as much.

Just offer and see what happens!

May 7- This is an easy one. Talk about it.

We have a crisis and need in our area. 8-11 children are being removed from their homes daily in our county. And just in Palm Beach County alone there are currently over 1600 kids under DCF supervision.

Choose to be aware.
Choose to tell others.
Choose to share ways to help.
Choose to help yourself.

https://www.4kids.us/CloseToHome
https://www.fosterpalmbeach.org/
https://www.placeofhope.com/foster/

May 8- Pray. And pray intentionally and specifically. Get to know the families fostering or the children in the foster care system.
Pray for the parents.
Pray for the children.
Pray for the children that have come and gone.
Pray for our judges and lawyers and case workers.

Commit to prayer.

May 9- Where are all my teachers, retired teachers, or really anyone who can teach?

You can help out foster children by offering to tutor. These children have so much transition and trauma in their lives.. often times keeping up in school is nearly impossible. A tutor goes a long way! Even just someone to work with them on their homework!

May 10- Here is day 10 of ways you can get involved.

We have seen a lot of news stories like this one lately.

May 17- Mentor a young adult who has just aged out of foster care. If you are looking for a local connection, contact Villages of Hope. The stats are not good for children who come out of foster care. 20% end up homeless instantly. Less than 3% graduate from college. 7 out of 10 girls who age out of foster care become pregnant.. which keeps the cycle going. Many of these children will be arrested and serve time. They need a stable adult who can help them learn. Would you consider?

May 18th- Write a number. Write 1600 on your hand. When other’s ask, explain that is how many children are in foster care here in Palm Beach County. Tell them about some of the things you have learned! Spread the word!

May 19th- Be patient with foster children. These children come from some hard places. They may have only felt rejection. If you volunteer at a church, coach a team, work in a school, shop at the store… please be patient. A little kindness and understanding goes a LONG way.

May 20th- Buy diapers and wipes and donate them to a local Foster
Closet. Foster babies need them! You can help provide them!

May 21st- Donate your airline miles to a foster family so they can go on a trip. Or maybe pay for a gas card? Traveling with extra children is more expensive.. but can also create really memorable experiences for these kids!

Thanks for reading! I look forward to seeing the love you will show and the differences it will make!